This moon I am focussing on the intersection between the second and third chakras. Our watery, emotional relationship with the Other comes into contact with our fiery, self serving ego. This lesson is all about embodiment boundaries and is particularly worthwhile for anyone who has ever felt like a door mat, or a people pleaser. Last moon I considered that moment of reaching out to another, this moon I am asking the question, what happens when that moment comes into contact with my ego? The third chakra is all about me, my and mine. It is self serving, and, unchallenged, it will enact my will at the expense of others. Many people need to work on this chakra because they are used to getting what they want, ignoring others’ desires, hurting people’s feelings, using or manipulating ohers for their own gain. In some ways the third chakra is the quintessential yogic focus. If we talk about building self awareness, our ego is the most obvious thing we can see in ourselves, it is where we are selfish, defensive,and controlling.
When we look at the third and second chakra intersection we are inviting ourselves to correct and rebalance our boundaries with others. If you never ask for what you want, you will never get it, but likewise, if you are treating people badly, I guess that can bite you in the bottom in the long run too. Where are you on that spectrum? Do you demand what you want and expect to get it, or are you patient and quiet? There is no right or wrong way to be. What is right for one person is wrong for another. We practice yoga for peace of mind, and there are different ways to get it.
Mostly we seek peace in our relationships with others, and I am intersted in challenigng the notion that it is ok to let people walk all over you. If you feel like you have relationships where you are not heard, maybe its time to look for ways of expressing yourself more clearly. Take an assertiveness course, go to drama lessons, learn to sing. I chant every day as part of my yoga practice. It is a key indicator of how I’m feeling. To be honest, I have to be feeling pretty low, drained or distratced not to want to sing. If I know, thanks to my yoga practice that I am not feeling strong, then I can choose to put up stronger boundaries both of self care, and in how much I give to others.
Unless you are doing karma yoga, yoga isn’t all about giving to others. Through meditation and self study you can begin to notice when you are letting others take advantage of your energy, or good nature. Instead you can learn to resist being too generous with your spirit. People are generally much more grateful for something they have to fight for, so not giving yourself away is an art to be mastered. Over time, trial and error will help you gain ground in your relatinships with others. If you have a propensity to be a shrinking violet, use your self awareness and awareness of others to work up some grrr: say no, refuse to smile, be aloof once in a while. I’m not saying be unkind, but little adjustments made with yourself in mind, could just give you the space you need to be the person you want to be.
Sarasvati Flow 